TWELFTH LESSON
On Duty towards our Parents.
"Honor thy father and thy mother, that thou mayest be long-lived upon the land."—Exodus 20:12.
My dear children, I have to speak to you today on your dearest duty, on the one which you fulfill with such happiness. To honor your parents, to reverence them, to show respect mingled with love and gratitude—can there be a feeling more natural than this, and is not this sacred obligation most deeply impressed in your hearts? Assuredly it might seem quite unnecessary to create such an obligation, to impose it on us as a duty; but God wishes to show us how important it is for us to fulfill this obligation; he wishes at the same time to make us understand that to fail in keeping it is an act of disobedience towards himself. If you understand well, my children, your duty towards your parents, and the motives on which this duty is founded, you will like to have it explained: if you have forgotten part of your duty, this conversation will, I hope, be of use to remind you of it.
The honor due to your father and mother comprises several equally important and sacred obligations; respect, love, obedience, gratitude, and care.
You owe respect to your parents, because they hold towards you the place of God Himself; because it is He who gives them their authority over you, and that you depend entirely on them. You owe them respect also, on account of their virtues and their age, and last of all because next to God they arc your highest superiors. The tenderness your parents show to you, their sometimes too great indulgence, your intimate and daily inter-course with them, must never cause you to forget the respect due to them; this respect should be as evident in your actions as in your language. Many words and manners, that might be allowed among equals, would be improper with superiors, and quite reprehensible towards a father.
What must then be thought of a child who considers himself at liberty to argue with his parents, to uphold opinions that are quite the reverse of theirs, and answer rudely to their remonstrances? What must then be thought of a child who not only blames his father or mother in his own mind, but who does still worse and complains of them to strangers, or to play-fellows? I will not say that this child does not love his parents, but assuredly I feel inclined to believe that he respects them very little.
I should look upon it as almost an insult to you, to insist on the love you owe your parents; but let us pause for a moment and take note together of this remark: it will be well not to forget. Sincere affection, real tenderness, should not be kept hidden in the depths of our hearts or should not show itself merely in words and caresses: when you love truly, you do more than say it, you try to prove it. Your parents, my children, surely repeat to you several times a day how dear you are to them, but at the same time they also give you proofs of their tenderness at every moment of their lives. Show them your love in the same way by your constant fear of incurring their displeasure, by your wish to content them, by your entire obedience to their commands.
At another time we intend to enter into full particulars concerning obedience; but you must understand from this very moment, my dear children, the necessity there is for you to be obedient. Your parents have the task of bringing you up, of teaching you to get the better of your bad habits, and accustom you to practice virtue: how can they succeed in this attempt if you resist them, if your will be not entirely under the control of theirs?
Remember, my dear children, that your duty towards those to whom you are indebted for life, obliges you to show them every attention and affectionate care, as also the deepest gratitude, and whatever may be the faithfulness with which you fulfill this duty, be fully persuaded that you will never be able to return your parents more than a very slight portion of what they have done for you. If you knew how much trouble and anxiety you have already cost your poor mother, how many nights she has passed by the side of your cradle, how great has been her grief at your slightest sufferings! If you could have seen her tears, heard her prayers when you were really ill! You can assuredly say that you owe her several times your life; and besides, is she not the one of all others who knows best how to make life pleasant to you?
Your mother, my children, takes an active part in your education, so as to lessen the difficulties of study; she herself watches over your temper, for fear no one else might know as well a, she how to be both gentle and firm. Whilst striving to make you good and talented, she does not forget your amusement for your joy is her happiness. Oh, in return, ought you not to be desirous to do something for so kind a mother! Why, then, for instance, when she is busy, uneasy, or poorly, is it so difficult to obtain from you, dear children, less noisy games, a little peace and quiet?
And as to your father, my children, if business prevents him being home as frequently with you, he nevertheless shares all the feelings of your mother towards you. It is often to the exertion of the father of the family, and to the business he undertakes, that are owing the means required to give his children a good education. It is on account of the esteem due to him, that at a later period his sons will meet with protection and kindness. Does not this deserve your most affectionate gratitude?
You must show this gratitude to your parents, my children, by always being respectful, attentive, kind and amiable in your behavior towards them. It is thus you will fall into the practice of filial piety, that virtue to which, even in this world, the Lord has promised unnumbered blessings.
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